We knew without being told what a Labradoodle was, of course. It meant that a good retriever got too close to one of those tippy-toe prancing fluffs and now there are puppies that need good homes. We’d been broken in to this world by cockapoos and peekapoos, so a genuine Labradoodle wasn’t that much of a stretch. “You’d get a dinkahuahua, of course.” “Hope it isn’t catching,” Dud said. “A Scottish terrier and a great Dane would produce some Great Scotts,” Dud said. “If one of them Australian dingos got crossed with those little Mexican dogs,” Dud said. We shrugged. The groaning continued for minutes while we got refills. “Well?” “But what would it unlock?” “A litter with an identity crisis? “You take one of them Japanese Akitas,” said a guy from the truckers’ table, “and cross him with a Boston terrier, you’d get Akitaboston.” “OK,” said our waitress, finally succumbing to the downward spiral of waning intellect, “if you had a part saluki, part terrier and crossed it with a part bull mastiffand part Llasa apso, what would you get?” “At least that would sound fairly good in a classified ad,” Doc added, nodding. We looked at him and waited. “No. You’d get a bunch of ap-saluki-terri-bulls.” “This is getting bad … but now that you mention it, what if a half Yorki-half old English sheepdog got interested in a lonely papillon. You’d find yourself with yoroldpappis.” “You send that same corgi on a blind date with a shar-pei,” Dud said, “and you could end up with a bunch of card sharps.” “Labradoodles? Some lady in the city has Labradoodles,” Doc said, putting down the paper. I think that’s when Doc hit him with the napkin. “You know,” Doc said, “if you were to cross Lassie with a Cardigan Welsh corgi, you could get a colling card.” At least it gave us something to talk about over coffee. At least when it was over, no one had suggested a tryst between a shih-tsu and a bulldog. Home CountryBy SLIM RANDLES The waitress was giving us looks like she needed our seats at the counter to be empty. Especially since the dog-combo disease was spreading.